That I may know Him...

"Seek until you find, do not give up. And pray even if you think you can't believe anymore, because God listens even to the unbeliever when they lose hope. God will help you go through all disappointment and hardship. Do not give up and above all else avoid distractions that you know might deter you from what you truly want. If you happen to fall, stand up and carry on in your walk. For as long as a man does not discover something to die for, he is not prepared to live." Johann Cristoph Arnold

I remember a really funny story, my friend Andreea David, told me. She was in church sitting next to one of the tallest man I personally ever met, an American missionary in Romania. At some point the preacher from the front, trying to be all entertaining said: "I am in love with a man, His name is Jesus", at which point Andreea shouted: "Amin" but the American missionary said: "Easy for you to say!" (presumably because Andreea is a girl:-) That's what I think Paul was- he was in love with Yeshua and out of love he committed to Yeshua's cause to such a degree that he still amazes us today. For Paul, knowing Jesus became close to obsession, telling others about Him the purpose of his life: "I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death..." (Philippians 3:10).

I think he was always an extremely dedicated man. He was the talmid (disciple) of Gamaliel, one of the greatest Rabbi of his time, he was a Roman citizen and he spoke several languages. When he defended Judaism, he defended it with the passion of a mad man. After he met Yeshua Ha Mashiach he dedicated all his life to Him and to speaking about what He's done. He suffered a lot for what he believed, but he was resilient: "I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my own countrymen, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false brothers. I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked. Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches." (2 Corinthians 11:26-28)
He found his strength in Yeshua and he carried own: "But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me... For when I am weak, then I am strong." (2 Corinthians 12:9-10b)

I love Paul's letters to his churches, through them he taught me this life I'm living for God is to be taken seriously, not taken for granted just because Yeshua paid the price not me. He taught me guilt is in the past and has got nothing to do with my present, and that if I want to run to my target, guilt is a burden that will either slow me down or stop me completely: "Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:13-14)
He also taught me that when you speak passionately about what you believe in, you might not be very popular with everybody and some might thing you're a fanatic, but that should not deter you in any way: "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." (Galatians 6:9)
Paul wrote his letters to the churches he planted, addressing specific issues of those times but many of those issues have a spiritual an practical application today. These letters became doctrinal treasures for the Christian church and I personally consider they contain enough passion, eloquence and beauty to touch you and change you forever. But I see to many believers putting the content of these letters above anything else in the Gospels or the Torah and the Prophets (unless we talk about promises God made to Israel, we happily take those). That's how you meet church goers, heart broken because they are judged for not having their head covered, wearing a skirt, men for having long hair, you name it. My opinion is that Paul's purpose in life was to share the Gospel to the Gentiles, to teach us how to love as Yeshua loved and to live like Yeshua did. I think he would be very disappointed to see what his Gospel became in many churches today. With my apologies for those who do not consider The Message translation, a version of the Bible, I will use it anyway because of the way it explains theses verses (please feel free to use any other version to compare):

"If you've gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care— then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don't push your way to the front; don't sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don't be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand. Think of yourselves the way Christ Jesus thought of himself. He had equal status with God but didn't think so much of himself that he had to cling to the advantages of that status no matter what. Not at all. When the time came, he set aside the privileges of deity and took on the status of a slave, became human! Having become human, he stayed human. It was an incredibly humbling process. He didn't claim special privileges. Instead, he lived a selfless, obedient life and then died a selfless, obedient death—and the worst kind of death at that—a crucifixion." (Philippians 2:2-7)
With the Jews Paul was a Jew and with the Greeks he was a Greek, he could speak with the humble ordinary man in the market or debate with the Epicurean philosophers in the Athenian Areopagus, but he did not care about his image or fame one bit. Paul lived for Yeshua and died for Yeshua: "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." (Philippians 1:21) This doesn't mean he was on some sort of suicidal mission. It just means he was a completely free man, he feared nothing and there wasn't anything you could take away from him, because he carried his treasure on the inside: "For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it." (1 Timothy 6:7)

Have a blessed day.

Emanuela