What does He want from me?

"These troubles come to prove that your faith is pure. This purity of faith is worth more than gold, which can be proved to be pure by fire but will ruin. But the purity of your faith will bring you praise and glory and honor when Jesus Christ is shown to you." 1 Peter 1:7

"You were bought, not with something that ruins like gold or silver, but with the precious blood of Christ, who was like a pure and perfect lamb." 1 Peter 1:18b-19

The more I am put in circumstances where I feel things are being asked of me or that I a "losing rights", I come to see very practically that God is not asking of me anything that He didn't give first. One precious lesson was when He taught me how not to give up. I came to understand that He didn't give up for my sake no matter how horrible it all became, and that thought motivated me and it birthed in me this desire not to give up for His sake no matter how hard it gets. He didn't give up first, so I'm not going to give up either.

Then shame and guilt and pain because of failure used to keep me at distance from Him. I was avoiding Him because I was ashamed of myself. Then I found the verse from Hebrews 12:2 "...But he accepted the shame as if it were nothing because of the joy that God put before him" (Romanian translation "He despised shame"). I realised He ignored pain and shame only to be with me, so I won't allow pain and shame to keep me away. It hurts me when I forget that I am part of His reward for the price He paid. He deserves to have the whole of me because He gave Himself completely. So I won't deny Him His time with me only because guilt tells me otherwise. There are two perfect words in God's Kingdom, powerful enough to break any walls between us- Forgive me.

I read this morning the paragraphs above from 1 Peter- troubles most often than not have a meaning- they test my faith. I read that for God my pure trust in Him is more precious than gold, because as oppose to gold pure faith can't be destroyed. How does this pure faith behave? Like this: "You have not seen Christ, but still you love him. You cannot see him now, but you believe in him. So you are filled with a joy that cannot be explained, a joy full of glory." 1 Peter 1:8
He only asks this pure faith of me because of the pure price He paid to have me- the blood of His precious Son, The Perfect, Spotless One.

What does He want from me? Nothing He didn't give already.